Just Look At My Resume

I’ve been spending the week applying for jobs for the upcoming school year. A little something to help ease the costs, maybe let me get that Creamette pasta instead of the store brand.

All of the applications were online, of course. They all required a resume, of course. And each of them also required I spend 15 minutes manually writing in all the information that is on my resume into their online form. Fam. Just look at my resume. Why am I putting together a resume in the first place if you’re going to have me re-type everything? Are you using it to wipe your ass? Do you need kindling for your fireplace? Are you using it as insulation? If not then put the thing on your desk and look at it instead of demeaning me by writing that the job title at my old job was something dumb like “student worker”.

Nextly, it’s none of your damn business how much money I made at my last job. The fact that the on-campus food service company paid me slightly more than they pay prisoners shouldn’t impact how you pay me. Even as the most middle class white male of them all, it’s still discrimination and wage-theft. Pay me what you think you should fucking pay me, don’t pay me what my old job paid me.

Oh and lastly, JUST LOOK AT MY RESUME.

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